So it wasn’t enough for this crazy bitch to move house and work like a dog over the past two weeks; she now has to prove her absolute stupidity by heading off to the slopes for a skiing holiday.
Thredbo is no Hayman Island.
I could lie and pretend that I am excited at the prospect. But I know you wouldn’t believe me.
To be honest I was rather counting on the snow being a no-show this early in the season and then global-warming got in the way of my scheming and dumped some mass of 50cms of coldness which made it virtually impossible for me to find an excuse NOT to ski.
I am looking forward to this little sojourn in the fucking freezing cold about as much as plucking nipple hairs without the anaesthetic of a good wine.
I blame the old man.
This skiing malarkey is all part of his sad-ass mid-life male crisis. Frankly, I wish he’d just bought a penis-extension of a car instead.
I’d be quite happy to nest for the next week in my new apartment with its sauna heating and shiny new-ness, surrounded by my new Ikea creations.
What I don’t want to be doing is risking life, limb and dignity on snow, challenging snowboarders as target practise and forced to wear fugly, extended layers that add volume to my already voluminous physique.
I realise that I give the old man a hard time in this blog but this is serious pay back for him.
I am either a sucker or a martyr to marriage.
What happened to the Old Man’s lycra? Shouldn’t he just stick to that as his mid-life crisis fix-it? At least you wouldn’t freeze that way. I’m off to En Zed in a month and hubby will be getting in all the skiing he can handle. Myself, on the other hand, will be quite content to sit by the fire with a glass of red in one hand and a good book in the other! (Can’t you take that option? 😦 )
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I’m working on it. Luckily the ski passes are super-expensive so I’m persuading him that I can save him money by having a 3 day pass.
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Hahahaha yes, hubby just spent over $200 heading to the slopes for ONE DAY……… petrol, pass, skitube…
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Feign limb damage on day one. Spend the rest of the break in the ski lodge having saunas/massages and drinking copiously.
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I like the idea of apres-ski but not actual skiing. I agree with gluestickmum. Pull a tendon on the first day.
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Haha…I agree. Snow is so much TROUBLE. All that gear and effort! So much nicer to languish in the sun with a cocktail.
You are a true martyr, Louisa – hope the old man appreciates it. 😉
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